Dis-card

Welcome to yet another glimpse of my inner crazy...

I'm doing a major cleanup at my house right now, and once again, I am faced with the dilemma of what to do with old cards. I have a stack of them that I just don't know what to do with. I hate throwing cards out, because the person obviously cared enough to pick it out, write it, and send/give it to me. On the other hand, if I kept every card ever given to me, I would need a whole room just to store them. I might be kinda messy sometimes, but I will NEVER end up like those poor folks on "Clean Sweep" with one room in their house devoted to piles and piles and piles of useless junk! Nevah!

Particularly meaningful cards I keep in a special box, but the rest? I waffle around and eventually put them into the recycling, but not without much guilt, and then usually only after they've been sitting in a file or a pile on my shelf for months and months. Why do I do this? It's not like I'm going to insult the person who gave it to me! Sheesh, it's just a card!

What do you do with cards you are given?

That's it! *UPDATED!*

I have had enough. My monitor is crap and my back is a twizzler stick everytime I sit down at my computer. Which is often. I just downloaded my pictures from my fantastic fantastic fantastic weekend and they look like garbage on my way-too-dark monitor.

I am leaving right. now. to buy a new monitor. No, really. I've said it before (here and here) but I'm going this time.

Stay tuned (right, cause you really care that much! Tee hee).

------------ UPDATED, 9:17pm ------------

Oh my gosh! The colours! They're so bright! My back! It's straight!
(My desk! It's so clean!)

_____Before______________________________________After_____
Notice how washed out the colours are in the 'before' picture? Before I knew my old monitor was so bad, I thought my photos looked bad cause of my camera. I adjusted each and every one so that the colour looked "right." D'oh.

Bye bye old monitor!

I am certifiably INSANE

I have aBOUT a bazillion things to do before I leave. Stuff to do, stuff to buy, bookings to make, cities to research. A house to get spic and span (oh and trust me, there's a LOT to do in that departnemt) before my friend moves in for the month of August. And one more week of summer school to teach.

And I am going camping alllll weekend. It's gonna be fantastic, and I wouldn't cancel for anything, but
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Two weeks from RIGHT NOW

I will be sitting in the airport, waiting to board my plane. HOLY SMOKES! When I put that little ticker up there I nearly had a heart attack, cause it was telling me 15 days. Surely I punched in the date wrong. But noooo! I have SOOOO much to do still, EEK!

Ok, I'm going to give you fair warning. I will be posting a whole bunch about my trip in the next two weeks (and will do as much posting as I can while I'm away, cause hey, that's kinda one of the points of a blog, now, isn't it!).

Anyway, I'm just sitting here squealing with glee cause I found out that the day I arrive in the Cinque Terra (5 tiny fishing villages on Italy's north west coast), there is a fireworks display! A spectacle of lights set off from the beach over the sea, says the website. Squeeee!

My delight

Tonight was our young adults BBQ down at Kits beach. It's once a month during the summer - we all bring something to BBQ, hang out, play some goofy games (yay - water balloon toss!), and have a brief talk/discussion time. Part of the discussion revolved around the question of what we take delight in. It was so good to be able to stop and reflect on that again tonight.

Even just the word struck me. Delight. How often do we as adults feel delighted at something? Why does it seem like it's only children who delight in things sometimes? I want to be more of a person who takes delight in things, who thrills, who marvels at the world around me - the big stuff and the little - and at all that God has done for us.

I feel like I'm getting a fresh sense of who God is these days, and of how mind-blowingly huge his love for us is. Between good talks with friends, the current sermon series (Darrell Johnson) at my church, and spending a whole lot of time in the mountains and at the beach, I'm finding lots of opportunity for delight these days.

I find my delight in nature, particularly the ocean (I've mentionned this before). The quiet and the earthy smell of the woods and the majesty of the mountains around me, too, puts me in awe of God. Music touches me in a particular way, too, and when the two of those are combined, wow.

I also take delight in the sunset, gelato, giggling kids, blueberry crumble, being silly with friends, giving or getting a hug, rollercoasters, the sun on my face, a good talk with a good friend...

What do you take delight in?

You'd think his legs would get tired

This guy's crazy idea to make a video where he danced in every place he travelled to got picked up by a gum company and got him a sponsored trip around the world to dance... and dance... and dance...

(video will now play from this page, just click play!)

Escaped kisses

In my afternoon class at summer school, I'm teaching 11 kids who have just finished kindergarten and are going into grade one. So they're five, maaaybe six. Two of the kids, a boy and a girl, have been inseparable since the beginning of summer school. Today, Safad* came up to me and announced: "Miss Hillary, Susanne* just kissed me."

I laughed to myself, thinking, there's got to be some appropriate teacher-y thing to say here, but I have no idea what it is. I was too amused to think of anything quick enough. These kids are little. They do stuff like that. Honestly, I think it's just super cute, as long as it doesn't get out of hand.

"Oh. What do you want me to do?"

He grinned. "Nothing." And off he went, back to the special teacher's chair to scrunch up with Suzanne and finish reading the book they were sharing.

I called over to Suzanne, "Suzanne, I know Safad is your friend, but we don't kiss at school."

She called back, with all the innocence of a child:
"I know. I couldn't help it. I just LIKE him sooo much!"
_____________
* Names changed

Just let it marinate

I have a confession to make: I want what I want and I want it now.

If we're honest, isn't that the way we all feel sometimes? (Back me up on this one here, folks!) Why is waiting just so stinking hard somtimes? I want something to happen, whether it's an opportunity, a relationship, a posession, a change in myself, or whatever, and I want it to happen now. Poof! Instant satisfaction.

Problem is, God just doesn't work that way. He seems to reeealy like to make us wait. And wait. And wait. And wonder what the heck he's up to.

There are a few situations in my life these days where I so want things to be different than they are, but it seems there is just absolutely no way that that is going to happen right now. One (among many) of those situations involves a friend of mine. Our friendship has taken a bit of a beating, I guess. I used to talk to this person regularly, but a series of events transpired and we don't really talk much anymore. Right now, it feels like I've lost a good friend, and it makes me sad. I think time will make things better, but I want them to be better now. I miss my friend. There a few other situations, too, and every time I think about trying to change things a little, I come up against a brick wall. Ok, God, I get it.

No. Not now. Patience. Wait. In the words of a wise philosopher named Hitch, "Just let it marinate."

I get tired of sitting around in the muck and the goo, but I guess it's necessary in order to let the things God wants to teach me soak in, to permeate my character. (Um, did I just compare myself to meat?)

It's learning to be content with the way things are that I think is going to be a big lesson for me these days. And so here I sit, wondering what God's got up his sleeve, knowing that sometimes the most important things are teh things he does in us in the waiting times. I know that God is good, and that he has got great plans for my life. I've just got to learn to do that whole patience thing a little bit better.

Gross Negligence

Well. For a near daily blogger a while back, I've been a tad absent the last... oh, MONTH or so. Yikers. I begged ya for comments then ran away (thanks for all the comments, by the way!). Life has gotten a little insane latey, but it's all oh-so-good. Summer is HERE! Here are some snippets from the last little while...

Trip planning: I've spent more time on the computer than I care to admit resarching places to stay, things to do. I have almost all my accomodations booked now, and have learned a few phrases in Italian, like "con vista grande, si possibile, per favore" (with a big view, if possible, please) and that a room is called a camera. I've decided that learning a few phrases like Basta! (enough!) and Non mi tocci (Don't touch me) would also be beneficial. Also in the phrasebook in the "help for women" section: Tu sei disgustoso (you're disgusting), Crepi! (drop dead), and Ho una malattia contagiosa (I have an infectious disease). I guess that would deter someone, now wouldn't it?

Summer School: I've got two classes, one in the morning, one in the afternoon, each with eleven kids. Oh my, it's sooo much easier than last year. I had never done anything like it last year, so spent HOURS after school preparing and trying to figure out what on earth was going on. This year, I already have almost everything planned. There's still stuff to prepare, but not nearly as much. All the better to enjoy the summer by!

Visiting: My very bestest friend in the whole wide world (Rachelle) was up from Iowa with her family visiting this past week, so I got to see her, Nathan, Mattias, and baby X. I love love LOVE it when I get to spend time with them! (DumBlogger isn't letting me post pictures right now, so click here for a picture till I can get it up on my blog)

Fruit: I am addicted to cherries. And peaches. And cherries. And blueberries. And did I mention cherries? (Again, there should be a picture here. Instead it's here. Thanks, Brian, for use of the photo!)

SUMMER FUN: Oh boy. Where do I start... over the last two weekends I have spent so much time outside, at BBQs, hiking (3 times), swimming in the ocean (4 times, woohoo!), hanging out with friends, watching sunsets, seeing fireworks, having great conversations ... it has been absolutely PERFECT. And tonight I went to Bard on the Beach - Vancouver's annual Shakespeare festival performed with the ocean, sky and mountains as a backdrop - with a big gang of people, too. There's a backpacking trip in the works one weekend in July, and hopefully the continuation of the newly formed Sunday tradition of church-lunch-hike-swim-chill with friends. Just what the summer should be, even if I do have to work! Brian, Brad, Kirsten, Vanessa, Rebecca and the rest... you have all made these days what they were! Thank you!

Thank you!

Yikes, this is a tad overdue.

I got my package from the candy swap! A big box-o-goodies arrived for me in the mail and I'm thouroughly enjoying the goodies! Thank you, Cherie, who sent me a pacacke of yummies made right in her home town - chocolate (a music note! So cute!), Holland mints (how appropriate, given my trip!), caramel licorice, among other things. Thanks so much!


Marla, your sweets are on their way!

School's out!!!

Wahooieee!

The last two weeks have been INSANE (as evidenced by my barely-there bloggging), but Friday at 5:00pm, I left school and started summer holidays! Yes, 5:00. Sick. Oh well, at least I left. What a crazy, crazy last week. This is somewhat of a "catching up" post. Beware. It's looong! :o)

Grade 7 Airbands: Every year, I have done a history of Rock and Roll unit with my grade 7's. We trace the roots of rock and roll all the way back to Africa and learn about it's evolution. It's great fun! At the end of the year, I have the kids get into groups, choose a song from the 50's or 60's, and put together an airband show. They perform in the gym on the stage for their peers and for the grade sixes, who I tell will be doing the same thing next year. It's always SO much fun, and the kids do a fantastic job. Everyone is clapping along, and cheering, especially for groups that aren't quite as polished as others. It's a really positive, fun morning. This year was no exception (except for two girls who weren't happy with their group so made up some story about having to go to Victoria for the day. Their teacher and I saw through that lie immediately, called them both in the evening to say that they had to come to school the next day. Well, they never showed. Even when their teacher called them in the morning and told them to get their butts to school. I couldn't believe it! I was so mad. But, I was also SO impressed with the rest of their group, cause they totally revamped their performance without the two prisses and performed anyway. I was so proud of them!). For nearly two hours, we had the gym rocking to songs like Surfin' USA, It's My Party, Magic Carpet Ride, Big Spender, and on and on. The kids were fantastic! I'm going to miss doing that unit with them next year!

Talent Show: Every year on the last day of school, we do a talent show. All the kids pile into the gym and watch sing, dance, play the piano, do marshal arts, tell jokes, do gymnastics, etc etc etc. Some kids are adorable, some kids have amazing talent, other kids... well... it's good that they want to get up and perform in front of nearly 700 people. I've always enjoyed the talent show, but without fail there are one or two acts that make me shake my head and wish these kids would just be KIDS. This year, some of the songs the kids chose to sing was disappointing. THREE groups/performers sang Unfaithful: "And I know that he knows I'm unfaithful/And it kills him inside/To know that I am happy with some other guy/I don't wanna do this anymore/I don't wanna be the reason why/Every time I walk out the door/I see him die a little more inside"

I'm sorry, but NINE year olds don't need to be singing about heartbreak and flagrant cheating. I wish artists would realize the impact they have on kids and actually write stuff that could make a positive impression. I know, I know, music isn't all for kids. I guess I just get so frustrated that kids are forced to grow up so fast, and that acts like that are approved. One of the students who sang this song was a grade four BOY. It killed me to hear all the grade six and seven kids snickering (loudly) when he got to the line "to know that I am happy with some other guy." ARG! Can we not set limits on what kids can sing/do at the talent show??? I'll just remember instead the kids like the little kindergarten boy who got up and belted out "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" accapella into the mic. A song appropriate for his age, and oh so very cute!

Goodbyes: The kids finished up on Thursday of last week, and we had our staff party Thursday night, then Friday we a big breakfast prepared for us by our administrators. The year end food fest is really rather ridiculous, but oh so YUMMY! Our principal runs a cooking school in the south of France every summer, if that gives you an idea of the gourmet style food we get whenever she's involved in something! After breakfast we acknowledge all the people who will be leaving our school for transfers, retirements, maternity leaves, etc. There are gifts and speeches and general warm wishes all around. It's always sad to see people go, but this year was particularly difficult because of two teachers who are leaving out school - Mr S and Mr G.

Mr G is transferring to another school after about 10 years at my school. The school will not be the same without him. He is the most grounded, kind, helpful person. He's always willing to help out, particularly with computer woes, answer a question, or give encouragement. He's taught me a lot and I've been so grateful for the support he's given me in my music program over the last three years. It will be so strange to not have him there next year.

Mr S is retiring this year, after 37 years of teaching. It's his job that I am taking over, but that does not in any way mean I am glad to see him go. Like Mr G, he has been such an inspiration to me as I am at the beginning of my career. He has taught me so much. Plus, he is one of the most friendly people I know! He was the first teacher I met when I got to the school and he gave me a great big welcome, really made me feel a part of the school right away. He always has fabulous stories of his travels and his former students. But most of all, he has an incredible way with the kids. He may be 50 odd years older than them, but he has a gift for empathizing with them, for seeing the world through their eyes, and for cutting through all the crap they try to throw at him but still treating the kids with such respect. He instills self confidence and self esteem in every student. I could go on and on, but suffice it to say he is a role model for me and for how I want to treat my students. There was hardly a dry eye in the house when saying our goodbyes to Mr S. The school will simply not be the same without him there.

Packing up: The last order of business for this school year for me was packing up my classroom and moving upstairs. After the breakfast (and about 2 hours of yakking with the people who were still finishing things up! Hey, this is ME we're talking about here!) I got down to business in my room - boxing things up, sorting through files, making trips up and down the stairs and/or elevator and loading everything into my new classroom. It really started to sink in that, HOLY SMOKES! this is MY classroom. MY kids. MY responsibility. *GULP* I am so excited to head back in August and get organized and set up, and get planning for the start of school. After a good long holiday, of course.

Ah yes, holidays. My brain is so in holiday mode right now. After the fantastic Canada Day I had yesterday, a short hike and another swim in the ocean after church today, and a long hike and, you guessed it, another swim planned for tomorrow, I couldn't be happier! Summer school starts Tuesday, but I'm gonna enjoy every second of this hot summer long weekend while I can! YES!!!

O CanaD'oh!

Shoot! I missed it! It's officially no longer Canada Day. Happy Canada Day anyway!

I had a fabulous day today! It was officially the first day of summer holidays (last day of work was yesterday, yippeeeeee! Yeah yeah, I'm back at sumemr school on Tuesday, shhhh, let me have my moment!) and boy was it a quintissential summer day! The day started off with a BBQ down at Locarno Beach. Bocce, swimming, tanning, hanging out - we did it all. We then headed downtown to the False Creek/Yaletown area to catch some of the Jazz Festival, though whether what we were listening to was Jazz or not is debatable. Oh well, it was live music in the park near the water, so who cares! Then off we went to English Bay. We grabbed soem dinner and ate on the beach, then walked along the Stanley Park seawall to Siwash Rock and settled in to watch the Canada Day fireworks (we began to wonder if they were actually happening cause they got started so late!). We even had a little bonfire going. Of ocurse, then we had to walk allll the way back to Yaletown where our cars were - about a 5 or 6 km walk.

The day was fantastic! What a great way to celebrate Canada's 139th birthday and the start of summer! Yahoo!

Happy Canada Day!

Counting Down *UPDATED*

~ update below ~

Yes, I'm counting down the days till school's out (four), but that's not what this countdown is about. My lil blog here is nearing 20,000 hits since I installed my statcounter back in May 2005. That's peanuts for some, but kinda fun for me!

So, you have a job... See that "Countdown to 20,000" in the sidebar to the right? See the number underneath it? If you're looking at it and it says 20,000, you WIN! *ding ding ding* Leave a comment or email me with your email address and I'll tell you what your prize will be!

And hey, while we're at it, if you're reading this, you need to comment! Yes. You. If you don't have a blogger account, that's ok! Just click "comments" then choose "other to leave your name. It's my goal to have 50 30 comments on this post. Why? Cause it'd be fun, and cause you reallyreallyreally want to make me happy!! So if you're a lurker, now's the time to say hello! Say anything, big, small, funny, serious - all comments welcome! Help me reach my goal of 50 comments. Go visit other commenters, too. You'll get to meet lots of fun folks that way!

Counting down... as of the time I published this post, only 253 hits left to go!

(hey... you! Back away from that refresh button! ;)

***************************

Well, I got my 20,000th visitor! Unfortunately #20,000 hit refresh 42 times to get there, but hey, what are ya gonna do? If I don't count that one, then the REAL 20,000 was someone from Victoria, BC who finds my blog via "my yahoo." They were here around 11:30pm on Tuesday June 27. Was that you? Say hello!

Anyway, thanks all for playing along with my game! Still a few comments to go to hit my (revamped) goal....

ka-BOOM!

That, my friends, is the sound of my head exploding. I have too. much. to. do. There's just too much going on right now, and it's making me carzy. See? So carzy that I can't even spell crazy right!

Stuff to do to get my house in order (ha! like THAT'S ever gonna happen). Stuff to do for Retiring Teacher's party. Stuff to do to get my classroom all packed up for the move upstairs to "real teacher land." Stuff to do to get ready for summer school. Stuff to do to get ready for my trip. Stuff to do to get ready to go river rafting this weekend. (Oh, yeah, I'm going river rafting this weekend, yipee!) Stuff to do for just general living. (Mental note, I need to buy milk.)

AAHHHH! I need myself a serious "stuff to do" list or I'm gonna go bonkers. (Of course, here I am bloggin instead of tackling some of my gargantuan list of things to do, but that's beside the piont. Hush!)

OK. Rant done. Carry on, people, carry on.

~~~~~~~

This week I've started to tell my students, many of whom I've had for three years now, that I won't be the music teacher at my school anymore. I've gotten a range of reactions from cheering (thanks a lot, twits! ... actually, come to think about it, the kids who cheered are the kids I'm not really gonna miss dealing with anyway, so nyah nyah, it's mutual, kiddos! eep, did that just come out of my... er... fingertips? I mean, I love all my little darlings equally, yes, that's it...) to a dear sweet grade two girl wailing, "Oh, nooo! What will I ever do without my favourite music teacher?!?!?!?" then promptly running up and throwing her arms around my waist. A little dramatic, yes, but still... warm fuzzies! Well, not so much when I had to pry her off, but you get the idea.

But it really is hitting me that I won't be, well, the whole school's teacher next year. I LOVE coming back from getting coffee or a bite to eat at lunch and having throngs of primary students run up to me all waving and smiling. "Hi Ms! Bonjour Madame! Hello Ms!" Or looking out over the sea of heads at assemblies and thinking, "These are all 'my' kids!" And I'll miss interacting withh all the staff, too. Right now, I talk to everyone, because I teach their classes. But next year, I won't even see the primary staff that often becasue we'll have different recess times.

So in the midst of the chaos, frustration, and exhaustion of the last few weeks of school, I'm enjoying the moments that make me smile: A grade one student announcing to his teacher after I told him I was going to teach grade 5 next year, "Ms. is going to be a REAL teacher next year!" Students spontaneously bursting into a song I've taught them when I pass them in the halls. A grade 8 girl who came back to visit and still remembers some silly chant I did with her at the beginning of grade 7. It's that kind of thing that makes me sad to be moving on. I made all the kids promise to still say hi to me when they see me in the halls! :D

~~~~~~~

A special hello to Auntie Connie! She's the bestest! *grin*

I'm leeeaving, on a jet plane!

Well, the ticket is bought, so there's no going back now...

I'm going to Europe this August for three and a half weeks!!! You can't see me right now, but I'm jumping up and down in my chair with glee!!!!! I'll be gone August 2-26, covering six countries.

So far the itinerary looks something like this:

Fly into Amsterdam, spend the evening/night there. I'll head to Belgium for a day in Brussels and a day in the medieval town of Brugge. On to Paris for 4 days, then to Munich to visit my friend Colleen for 2 days. I'll spend 4 days in Switzerland covering Zurich, Bern, and Lugano in the Swiss Alps, then spend a day and a half in Verona, Italy, home to Romeo & Juliet and the third largest Roman arena in existence. If I can get tickets, I may go see an opera in the arena. Then off I go to the Italian Riviera for 2 days in Cinque Terra, a series of five villages built right into the cliffs. I'll make my way back to the south of France for a day in Avignon, a day in Aix-En-Provence, and finish off with 2 and a half days in Nice. After some sunbathing on the French Riviera, I'll take a train back to Amsterdam and spend a day and a half exploring there before I fly back home.

I have so much to do! Rail passes to buy, hostels to book, cities ot research! I've been pouring over tour books and the internet for the last week, getting started on my plans.

Oh boy oh boy oh boy!!! I'm going to Europe!!!

Coping mechanisms

This last week has nearly driven me to drink. Well, ok, not nearly... I treated myself to TWO coolers last night. Something I SO rarely do. And it showed. (Right, Brad?) Ug. Everything is driving me crazy these days. The kids. Other teachers. My classroom. Report cards. My house. Myself. I'm overtired, I'm stressed out, I'm SO ready for school to be over.

The only thing that is holding what's left of my sanity together is the thought that, "Whatever, I won't have to deal with this next year."

I am SOOO glad that I'm not going to be teaching music next year. I've loved it, most times, but I'm D-O-N-E. No more trying to work around everybody else's field trips and special events. No more cleaning up half-finished latte cups full of soured milk left in my classroom by the teacher I share my room with. No more five thousand different ways people want their report cards. No more finding out at the last minute that the performances I've been planning for weeks will be pre-empted by basket ball games. No more not being able to follow through with ridiculous behaviour in my class. My kids will be my own, my reports will be my own, my schedule will be my own.

Next year will be different.

Only 11 teaching days left...

I'm hatching a plan...

... and it involves a passport application.

SQUEEEEE!!!!!

And today was Friday

After the week o' drama, I was kinda hoping for a calm day today. And I was almost home free, too. The kids were gone, I had handed in my marks to all the classroom teachers before school, and I was packing up my stuff to go when one teacher told me that I had to have a particular comment set on my report cards. A set I, indeed, did not include (an overall evaluative statement using specific wording designated by the ministry of education: "___ meets/does not meet, fully meets, etc expectations in music this term.").

"Oh, no, not for music. I was told last year that I wasn't supposed to use that comment set for music."

Well, it turns out that indeed, I am, even though the comments *I* wrote instead say essentially the exact same thing, with a few specifics added to highlight what we've done all term.

Goody.

I had just finished giving the marks and comments to all the teachers, and some had even entered them in their report card program already. Aaaand, now they have to be changed. It ends up being a fairly easy fix (if you have comment #16, also choose #1, if you have #17, choose #2, etc), but still... it's another weird confusing wrinkle for classroom teachers to figure out, it's an annoyance for them, and it's going to make ME look like I don't know what I'm doing when really I was going on incorrect information. Whatever, most of the teachers at my school are really understanding and it won't be a big deal at all to go back into the system and click an extra box for each child. But RAR! I sure wish I had correct info to go on when I STARTED the report cards, instead of after I had them all DONE!

This hiccup today made me realize something about myself: I'm no good at dealing with a change in plans. I find a solution quickly, and it all works out, but when I have got something planned out (in my head or otehrwise) and there's a last minute change thrown in, I go temporarily insane. My stress level shoots waaaay up, and I go into major frustration mode for a bit until stuff gets figured out. And the way I deal with stress? I talk.

"Oh my gosh I was told not to use these comments so I didn't and now I've given out all my marks only to find out that I DO have to use them and what will I do my life is over I'll have to spend my whole weekend redoing my marks and everyone's gonna be so mad at me and and and... AAHHHHHHH!"

And it always gets figured out. And it's never usually a very big deal. It just seems that way in my head. In my crazy, crazy head.

*deep sigh*

Va Va VOOM!

I've got a new blog of the week! See those big red lips over there in my side bar? Click em! Vavavoom is an Aussie with a really fun site. There's lots to explore. Plus, in her post titled "OOPS" she's got a HILARIOUS video of a blooper on an "American Idol" style show. You've got to see it to believe it!

I wonder what Friday will bring...

It has been drama week at my school this week. And I'm not talking your regular elementary school dramas of "He poked me," or, "She said I'm a girl," or "You're not coming to my birthday party!"

I'm talking D-R-A-M-A.

Today (Thursday): I come around the corner of the stairwell and happen upon a full-on fist fight between two grade 6 and 7 boys. "He spat on me." "He shoved a pair of tongs up my butt." (um, what?!) "I was just trying to get him off me." "But I didn't hit him that hard." (Oh, well, then, that's ok. Sheesh.) I haul them both up to the office, hear each side (while continually telling the other one that it's not his turn to talk), give them a lecture, and leave them for the principal to deal with.

Wednesday: Twice, just after lunch, there's a call that comes over the PA: "Would Grade 2 Girl please return to her class right away." This happens all the time. Kids play around in the washrooms, dawdle getting back from recess, etc, and get paged back to class. That Grade 2 Girl was being paged didn't surprise me in the least. What DID surprise me was 2 hours later, at about quarter to 3, there was another announcement on the PA explaining why there was a police presence around the school. A WHAT?!?! Turns out Grade 2 Girl has been missing since lunch. The police are doing a search around the school and would anyone with any information please call the office/search headquarters. My stomach knotts up into a tight little ball, and a hundred worst case scenarios flash through my head. I talk with my students about what was going on, assuring them that she was probably fine, and reinforcing various safety rules.

I go outside after the bell and there are FIVE squad cars, TWO unmarked cars, and a community policing cruiser. EIGHT cop cars. There are police everywhere, and there is a huge buzz happening as the entire school has just let out, parents are there, and everybdy's wondering, where's Grade 2 Girl? At about quarter after 3, her mom pulls up with the girl in the front seat. I just about burst into tears I'm so relieved to see her. Turns out mom came to pick her up at lunchtime for an appointment, but didn't tell anyone she was taking her. She left her backpack hanging on the hook, too. What's the teacher gonig to think? Yikes.

Tuesday: I'm in the cafeteria supervising a class of grade 4's. Girl 1 is mad about something, so she slams her tray down, making tortellinis and marinated carrot sticks bounce accross the table and hit another girl from her class. Girl 2 gets mad - I mean, a flash of rage - and grabs her tray of hot tortellini and dumps it all over the chest and hands of Girl 1. I get there, speechless at what I just saw. I make them pick up their tortellinis off the table and put them back on the tray, wipe down the table, and then tell them to finish their lunch. "But it's dirty." "Well, I guess you should have thought about that before you threw your food at her, huh." (ok, it came from the wiped off table top, not the floor, people) Both girls are bawling, saying they want to go home, and locking themselves in the washroom throughout this whole process. They end up refusing to eat and just head up to the office (which, by the way, is full of the grade 3 boy's posse who I caught on Monday doing various grade 3 boy crimes and who ended up losing their lunch hours for the week) to sit through lunch. I offered them other food from the "emergency" stash while they were in the office, but they refused to eat. Whatever.

Monday: Five classes go to the beach for an all-day field trip. While there, a mentally ill man high on meth comes up to a group of kids, particularly a group of grade 5 girls, drops his pants, and starts... uh... playing with himself. The police are quickly called, get there, and the guy takes up a shooting stance with his hands covered by a jacket. He says he's got a gun. The cops have to take it seriously, so they're there with guns drawn. In front of the kids. I'm sure everyone was ushered away, but it's a big open beach. They had to have seen. The police don't shoot, but tackle him to the ground and arrest him. The counsellor and youth & family workers spend all the next day meeting with the kids involved. The story makes it into the paper on Wednesday, and there are undercover cops posted at the beach for the rest of the week as other classes from the school have their beach days.

If all continues to go according to this week's pattern, we'll have another police incident tomorrow. Oh goody.

Fifteen school days till summer. Fifteen school days till summer......

Candy Swap!

Woohoo! What a great idea! Andrea over at A Peek Inside the Fishbowl is hosting a candy swap. I signed up, cause hey, who doesn't want candy?!?! It's kind of like the "pay it forward" of candy. Person A sends to person B, who sends to person C, who sends to person A. What a fun idea! Head on over to her Candy Swap post if you want to sign up! You've got till June 10, so it's not too late!

Candy Swap Questionnaire

1) When I was a kid, Halloween was all about:
a) collecting as much candy as I could - We'd go trick or treating with a pillow case cause it held more. We'd also scope out the richer neighbourhoods cause we figured they'd have better goods! And sharing? NEVAH! That loot was MINE!
(b) collecting candy to eat as I go
(c) sharing with my siblings
(d) Who cares about candy? I was too busy egging my teacher's car.
(e) Halloween was forbidden in my house and I've never gotten over it. Bring it on!

2) What is more important to you: quality, or quantity?
Ummm, why can't I have both? :-) Well, I guess as a kid it was quantity. Now it's quality. Though really, a little quantity every now and then never hurt anyone. Did I ever tell you how I bought a big box of 100 mini chocolate bars around Halloween one year for my classes? I kept forgetting to take it to school and all of a sudden it was empty! hehehe... WHOOPS!

3) If you were on a desert island (haha, I wrote "dessert island" but that would be a totally different question now wouldn't it?) and could only have one sweet treat, which would it be?
Dark chocolate, orange flavoured, with almonds. Dairy=chocolate, fruit and vegies=orange, protein=nuts. Three outta four ain't bad for a desert island!

4) You arrive at "Dessert Island" – where you discover a river of pudding flowing freely through a swamp of Cool Whip. No one is watching. What do you do?
Stand at the bottom of the pudding waterfall with my mouth open? Well, maybe that would be overkill. Though I WOULD go for a swim. Could you imagine? Doing laps in chocolate pudding? I don't know whether to be delighted or disgusted! ....... no, wait, I'd be delighted! Mmmmm!

5) Sweet, sour, or savoury?
Sweet and savoury are about equal on my scale, I think. Sour is good too, at times. Like sour keys. But I jsut suck off the sour and throw the gummy away - those things are like chewing on an eraser!

6) Sex or chocolate?
I've been told they go together quite well.

7) What kind of candy, if any, would you turn down if someone offered?
Usually anything black liccorice-y. Though I did try these super salty black licorice candies from Holland the other day. I was prepared for horrific, and they were only terrible. (Sorry Kirst!)

8) You're at the grocery store, you're children/husband/pets have been The.Worst.Ever. They're throwing cans at each other, tripping little old ladies, taking bites out of the produce and putting them back in the bins, and piercing the milk bags with diaper pins. You feel yourself getting woozy. That vein in your forehead is throbbing. You need an immediate sugar kick before you do something crazy. What do you reach for?
TRUFFLES! Or perhaps Ferrero Rochers. Or Hedgehogs. All of the above.

9) What are your feelings regarding Thrills gum, ribbon candy, scotch mints, and other "grandma candies"?
Meh, if they're the only thing offered, I'll take 'em, but I think there are better options out there! Though my grandma always had yummy candies, like those hard candies where the wrapper was made to look like a strawberry.

10) How adventurous are you? Do spicy dried mealworms or candy-coated crickets give you the willies, or are you willing to try anything once?
I'm not so much about the crickets.

11) Do you have dentures or other dental issues? Do you have a good dental plan?
Yesirree, bob! Bring on the sweets!

Oh. Um, that enthusiastic yes was about the dental plan, not the dentures. Though it WOULD be kinda fun to pop your teeth in and out. Think of how much fun I could have with my students if I could do THAT trick!

Now it's YOUR turn: Answer any of the questions above, or tell me, what's your favourite type of candy/chocolate?

WOOHOO WOOHOO WOOHOO!!!!!

Well. Yesterday, I began a great big stress fest that turned right around in my favour today. Just now, actually. It's lunch time and I'm at school sitting my the computer lab. I'm super excited and don't want to be obnoxious to the staff, but I can't keep it in, so I decided to be obnoxious here!

WOOHOO WOOHOO WOOHOO WOOHOO WOOHOO!!!!!!

Yesterday a friend of mine was telling me about a wrong deduction on her pay stub. She showed me, and I saw that she was making more than me, which is strange, becuase I've had a contract for longer than her. I should be on higher step, not vice versa. I asked if I could look a little closer, and figured out that I was not in the right salary category. Hmmm.... So how does THAT work? It began to dawn on me that I may not be getting paid correctly.

I left messaged at payroll and at the union to ask them to look into where I should be, if it was indeed a mistake, and to ask them about how to go about fixing it, if there's a problem. The union rep at my school told me I'd probably have to grieve it and that I'd be lucky to get my lost salary back, if indeed there was an error. Oh great.

Well today I checked my messages at home and payroll had called me back. Bright and cheery, she told me that, yes, I was on the wrong salary scale. She explained how it had happened, and then told me that it had been this way for the last TWO YEARS, not the last one year that I had thought it was. She then told me that I'd be getting my retroactive pay on my next paycheque.

The difference in pay for TWO. YEARS. On the next check. No battles, no grievances. And all this just before summer.

WOOHOO WOOHOO WOOHOOOOOOO!!!!!

You know you need more sleep when...

I was just leaving a friend's place this evening after dropping something off. I got in my car, and did the normal routine. Sat down, buckled up, dealt with the club, turned the car on, and went to drive out of my parking space on the street in front of my friend's appartment. It wasn't until the handle of my club THUNKed against my windshield that I realized I had put it ON my steering wheel and then had tried to drive away.

I am going to bed now.

_______________________________________________
Just a reminder to go check out my tenant/blog of the week! ---->

Blog of the week - My Pink Diary *UPDATED*

Well, after having that little "Rent my Blog" icon sitting empty over there on my side bar for faaar too long, I finally decided to do something about it. The very first bid I got was from Kailani over at My Pink Diary.

See that pink box over there on the sidebar, right below my photo? 'At's right... go click on it! The box is a link to her blog, and you won't be disappointed. She's a mommy of two girls, a flight attendant, and lives in Hawaii. Makes for some pretty great stories! Go check her out! Quick! What are you still doing here?

*UPDATE*
Aaaah. My apologies to you Firefox users. My sidebar was a dog's breakfast. Everything should be up now, including (finally!) the link to My Pink Diary. Sorry, Kailani!

Why I do what I do

One of the grade three teachers at my school gave her kids the assignment of writing a letter. It could be to anyone, about anything. Lots of kids wrote about their week, what they do at school, etc. Well, the teacher showed me a few of these letters. One in particular caught my eye because it contained my name. Here's what I read (click the picture for a larger view):

And on Wednesday we went to music. Our music Teacher was Mrs. ____.* We always get to play on the xlyophone. Thats why I like music class so much. Also I feel bit dizzy when I go to music because I am so excited to go. The xlyophone I like going is the metallic xylophone. I like it because it is just like a clock that does dinnnnggggggg! And another thing I like about it is the colour silver. It reminds me of my mom keeping a silver necklace in her small pocket. Also I feel confused when I say "I'm B and he says I'm B".** The thing I like the most is the mallets. Mallets are stick with a white ball on top stuck to it. And I like it because when I scratch it, it itches me. And when I feel it it is soft and ab it smooth.

Awww! He's dizzy with excitement when he comes to my class! But I think maybe he needs a review on what the mallets are used for!

Gotta love them kidlets!
________________________________________________________
* Nope, I'm not suddenly a "Mrs." Miss, Ms, Mrs... it's all the same to the kids! Just wanting to clarify! ;-)
** We don't have enough xylophones for everyone, so I get the kids to pair up and decide who's A and who's B. Then I choose partner A or B to start off on the instruments while the other one waits their turn

Not as young as I once was

"What am I, eighty???"

This is a question I've been asking nobody in particular these past few weeks as I've been getting increasingly more frustrated with all the whining and complaining my body has been doing lately.

I am NOT getting older. No! Never!! I will not have it!!!

Ever since my car accident in November (yeah yeah, I'm sorry, I refer to it a lot), I've been SO frustrated with my body. It aches, it creaks, it moans, it cracks. Ugh!

Before the accident, I was actually in an ok state of fitness (well, for me, anyway!). I was jogging, going to to the gym, hiking, just generally getting out and being active. That of course had to stop as I was dealing with whiplash (that and it was the winter time, a generally less active time for lots of people). About three months of not doing much got me out of the habit pretty quick, so when the doc finally said it was ok to slowly ease back into my routines, well, it took another six weeks or so before I actually did anything about it.

Basically I got sick of feeling like a fat lazy slug.

So I went for a run. Forty minutes, right off the bat. I thought I was going to die. BUT, I also felt great. Till the next day. My whiplash, which I was barely feeling the effects of anymore, was back with a vengeance, baby. My back was tight. It ached. I couldn't sit for long periods of time, I couldn't stand for long periods of time. And it kinda was my own dang fault. Crappity crap crap. So I stopped again for a few weeks, let my body recover.

Again, the fat lazy slug thing got me up at at 'em. Granted, a bit slower this time. I showed my face at the gym again, and took to slightly shorter runs. It was good. I was getting into the routine. I ran a few 5km runs, and felt great.

That is, until the day I ran about 5km then went for an 8km walk later that evening. My legs were kind of sore afterwards. Specifically my left calf. It ached. And it didn't go away. For a week and a half. I started doing some research and asking around, and lo and behold...

I have given myself shin splints.

Super.

Back to doing hardly anything again. I've been going to the gym, but have only been able to do about half the things on the circuit. Grrrr!!! I just want to get up and go!

I need to start slower, I realize that. But last night, as I was telling some friends of my woes (ah, how much patience my friends have with me!) my friend Laura pointed out: "We're not as young as we used to be."

And she's right.

Oh dear.

Just to see 'em squirm

Last week I met some girlfriends in a park nearby my house to hang out, chat, and share a carton of gelato. Mmmm... Through a series of rather random events, my friend Rebecca and I ended up at a choir rehearsal in the community center next door singing the names of several cheeses in operatic voices with a couple of guys we met in the park.*

Yeah, I know. Welcome to my life.

Well I, being the music teacher I am, thought this song would be peeerfect for a few of my primary classes. I made mental note of the words, and Rebecca and I sung it to each other over the phone a few times over the weekend (I love my kooky friends!) and I was all set to teach it to my kids today.

Senooo-o-o-o-oooo-o-o-o-ooo-oore, senior-iii-iii-na
Mozzarella, parmigiana, pescatore, pizza pie,
Mozzarella, parmigiana, pescatore, pizza pie, buh-dum-boum

They had the tune. They had the words. But the emotion! Ah, it was sadly lacking. They were just a bunch of singing lumps on the carpet! I wanted them to get their voices and entire bodies to portray a deep feeling when they were singing this song (can we say, dramatic exercise?), so we talked about opera, and how it was intensely emotional.

"People aren't just happy," said I, pausing to smile weakly at them, "they're HAPPY!" I flung my head back, shot my arms in the air, arched my back, and raised myself up on my tippie-toes.

A little louder now, I told them, "People aren't just sad," as my eyes turned downward and I stuck out my lower lip ever so slightly, "they're SAD!" I rolled my shoulders forward and let my head drop. As my hands fell to my side, I let out a heavy sigh and let my face feel the weight of all the sorrow I was trying to convey.

Still louder, I continued. "People aren't just mad." I frowned at the class. "They're MAD!" And with that, I scowled my fiercest scowl, lunged at them, one foot forward and my fists up and ready to fight. A few of them squealed and scurried backwards on the carpet.

"And of course... do you remember what 'seniore' meant?"

"Sir!" "Mister!" They all called out variations on what I had told them.

"And 'seniorina?' "

"Mrs!" "Maam!"

"Ah Haaa! Well, In opera, we can't forget about one veeeery important emotion! People aren't just in love, they're IN LOOOOVE!" One hand on my heart, I threw my head back and raised the back of my hand to my forehead...

...at which point the entire class of eight year olds scrunched up their noses and cried, "EEEEWWWWWW!!!!!"

Some raised their shoulders to their ears in disgust, some covered their ears, and some physically turned around to avoid the horror of even thinking about those cootie-laden creatures of the opposite sex. One boy mimicked ramming his finger down his throat and made loud gagging noises.

I got them to show emotion all right!

Ah, how I love horrifying my students with my antics! Giggle giggle!

* ok, ok, so Rebecca knew them, but it just wouldn't sound as good if I had told you that, now would it? ;)

Evolution of Dance

How many of these dances have YOU done?

I saw you... *updated*

That "I saw you" section of the classifieds has always creeped me out intrigued me. Some dude sees a pretty girl on the bus, they make eye contact or share a flirty smile. He wants to contact her somehow, so he takes out a classified ad in despearate hope she might see it. Some might call it romantic. I just call it creepy. Anyone got any stories involving an "I saw you" ad? Met their spouse that way or something crazy like that?

Well, I'm gonna suck it up and put an "I saw you" type ad right here on my lil' blog. Um, except it's not quite in the same context as the one I described above. Ok, it's not in that context at all.

I was looking at one of the blogs on my blogroll the other day and came accross a blog called "Thoughts on a Napkin" or something like that. It had a vase and a napkin with the title written on it placed among the flowers as the title picture. I read a few posts and really liked it, so I kept the window open meaning to come back to it later, but my dumb computer had a spaz and shut down on me. Now I can't remember for the life of me who had it on their blogroll. I've tried searching for it on google's blogsearch, but haven't seen it.

So... anyone know the blog I'm talking about? Would you be so kind as to leave it in my comments? Thanks in advance! :)

*UPDATE*
Yay! Anne from A little bit crazy pointed me in the right direction. Anne's the bestest! Go over and say hello. For a good chuckle, check out her series on Lily and Smacky! It made me giggle!

The blog I was looking for is called Notes On A Napkin. Katrina's "about" blurb is one of the best I've ever read (just below her picture). Her Lessons from Mom post is really touching. And plus, she links to Savage Chickens and Homestar Runner... she MUST be cool! :D

Parlez-vous francais?

I always enjoyed French classes in high school. I took French right to grade 12, and then when I registered for university, I decided to take first year French, too. First year French turned into second year French plus a French lit course, which eventually turned into a full blown major. Grammar, translation, phonetics, composition, linguistics, history, liturature, civilization... you name it, I probably did courses in it.

I decided on my major in part because I enjoyed learning a language, but in part because it afforded me lots of variety in the types of courses I took. I loved my classical studies courses, my religious studies courses, my anthopology, astromomy, chemistry, and math courses (ok, no, actually, I hated the math courses), but I didn't want to take as many of any of those as was required for a major. But French? Within the French major, there was so much variety. So I went for it, and filled the rest of my degree with as many different courses as I could.

After I graduated, I decided to go to Chicoutimi, Quebec to do a five week language program. Hey, why not? Becuase of Canada's 2-official-lanuages policy, the government has all kinds of programs to encourage people to learn either English or French. Like the summer language bursary program. Five weeks of language school, staying with a host family, all classes, activities, accomodation and meals paid for. By the government. Yee haw! What I lacked in oral skills in French from uni (that's one area in which my university really sucked!), I picked up in Quebec.

Now that's not to say I'm fluent. No way, no how. But I can carry on a conversation all right. Except when I stumble over not knowing the right words or make terrrible grammar mistakes. Eep! It's all fine and dandy when I'm teaching in French (the kids don't usually notice my mistakes, cause they're not quite there yet, thankfull!) or when I'm talking to other anglophones in French.

But talking to francophones? Yikes. I hate it. I bumble and stumble and mumble and jumble and can't find the right word and make super dumb I-totally-know-how-to-say-that-but-it-just-didn't-come-out-right type mistakes. And all allong in my head, I'm thinking, French is their first language. They're totally noticing all the mistakes I'm making. They must wonder how I'm even able to teach in French without butchering it, or totally messing the kids up... The first year I taught at my school, I didn't teach the French immersion kids, so some of the French teachers didn't even know I spoke the language till I got their kids the next year!

That's totally ridiculous, I know. I think it's a phobia or something. I really need to get over it!

Thankful

• for the sunshine on my face
• for strawberries and brie and sourdough baguettes
• for my sister and a great morning spent catching up
• for the opportunity to take a grade 5 class next year, right when I needed the change
• for the theatre and the plays I've enjoyed all year
• for the lilacs I pass every time I go out or come home
• for my parents, who as of yesterday have been happily married for 33 years (Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad, I love you!)
• for friends who love me and are always there for me (may I do the same for you)
• for those students who keep me sane and remind me why I'm a teacher (and even for the ones who make me question it)
• for a God who doesn't give up on me, ever

Kinda dim - stories of me and my monitor (updated)

Anyone got about $400* $300 they wanna give me? ... You? Ok, great!

Sigh.

I need a new computer monitor. Badly. This one is sooo old. I've already had to adjust some crazy setting so that it doesn't emit a high pitched squeal any time it's turned on. But that means that the screen kinda flickers. I don't notice it so much, but friends have asked me how on earth I deal with it. I just shrug my shoulders. I dunno. But the worse part is, as I recently found out, it makes all my pictures (and yours!) show up really dark. I just thought it was my camera (umm... and... all of your cameras, too... oh boy, I'm not too swift, am I?), and so over the last year or so I have spent HOURS (oh brother I don't even want to think about the hours I spent) "fixing" the colour on my photos. Lighten here, change contrast there, fill flash, brighten.... only to find out that... DUH! It was my monitor. Aaaaaand that all those pics I've posted on my Flickr account? Yeah, they're all heinously washed out. BLAH! I wanna cry! And kinda kick myself for being so dumb! :P

PLUS, a new monitor would fix the twizzled back issue I have with my knees going under the desk on one side, and my monitor being on the other. There's no room for the monitor and the keyboard to be in front of each other on my desk. And so I sit kinda sideways and twisted. And my chiropractor yells at me.

I went to Future Shop today and oogled the whole wall of LCD monitors. I might have drooled a little. Time to start saving some more pennies!


* Paul pointed out in the comments that my estimate was kinda high. He totally blew my cover! I was trying to take you for soem extra cash! Muah hahaaa! Well, ok, maybe not. I was just (badly) estimating on the taxes, warranties, etc. Heck, I'll take the $300, too!

Up Gold Creek without a paddle

Good thing we weren't in a boat. :P

It officially feels like summer should be here. Now. It's sunny and beautiful outside, I'm so ready to be finished teaching, the kids are ready to be done, too, and are starting to go a little squirrley, and this weekend I got a little taste of what I want to spend a whooole lot of time this summer doing: camping!

I went with my friend Michael, who goes camping a lot and is set up with all the gear. We had both had somewhat crazy weeks so he invited me to head up to one of his favourite camping spots in Golden Ears Park, about an hours drive out of Vancouver. We hiked in and set up camp right beside the river underneath a spectacular snow-covered mountain. It was sooo beautiful!

I had heard that there was going to be rain Friday overnight and Saturday morning - exactly the time we were going to be gone - but we went anyway, and Friday night it actually was clear enough to see the stars. There's just something about being out in the middle of nowhere under the stars and falling asleep - in separate tents, don't worry, mom! ;-) - to the sound of the river. Aaahhhhh...

I should really go camping every weekend. It would do my stress level good!

More pictures can be found here!

And the church came a-tumbling down

There's nothing like watching a big machine tear apart a building.

Finally, after about five years of the original wing of my church being condemned (it's still funny to say that my church was condemned!), it was torn down on Friday. I left for work early to watch some of the demolition.

I watched with mixed emotions. All four of my grandparents went there and my parents grew up going there. The part of the building they tore down used to be the sanctuary, but they have long since built a newer wing and turned the old part into a hall. I went to Sunday School in the basement there, and spent many Sunday afternoons running around on the stage in Fellowship Hall waiting for dad to finish up an elders meeting. I remember going to Pioneer Girls a few times while my mom was a leader, and having big family reunions there... I remember my great aunt and her crew bringing trays and trays of those little triangle snadwiches out of the teensie tiny kitchen off in the corner. Ha! I even remember the slightly musty smell the building had in its later years.

On the other hand, I'm so excited for what's to come. There's gonig to be a new wing built there with a much mroe welcoming and open feel, and a waaaay better use of the space. It's going to be great!

Here are a few of the pictures I took before, during, and after...

The old Tabernacle/Fellowship Hall

I love the beams of light and how you can see all three levels of the building - sunday school rooms below, old sanctuary/hall, and the balcony above.

I would think that this would be a really fun job!

It's gone!

Confession Time

Waaaaaay back in February (February 16, to be specific) my wallet was stolen out of my classroom. What a pain. I went about canceling everything and getting all my cards and documentation back. That stuff has all been replaced. The wallet itself, however, well, that's another story.

I have been carrying around my cards, receipts, frequent buyer cards, and general wallet stuff in a ziploc baggie for over two months now. My friends have been mocking me for over a month. I try not to bring it out anymore, I just dig around with it still in my purse and pull out the right cards. If I must bring it out, I always feel the need to explain myself. "My wallet was stolen... " I have even repaired a little hole with scotch tape. I know. Don't even say it. Why didn't you just use another ziploc bag??? Because whenever I was in close proximity of my ziploc bags, I wasn't thinking of it. But mostly because I'm lazy.

See, I'm picky about my wallets. It has to be just right. My last one was great. I was used to it. I had a system. It worked. Finding a new one was just gonna be a pain. Hmm... I seemed to have this issue with my hairdresser, too. She moved away and it took me two years to get my hair cut. Apparently me and change don't like each other too much! Dag nummit. Plus, I'm cheap. I wanted to just go to Bentley to get an el-cheapo wallet that would last me well like my old one did. Forget this $50 for a wallet business. Pshaw! BUT all the Bentley stores are far away from my house - totally out of the way.

Until today. I was actually downtown, and so FINALLY replaced my wallet! Woohoo! It's cute, it was cheap, and it has everything I want.


Now I can lay my trusty ziploc to rest and stop being mocked by pretty much everyone I know. For the ziploc, anyway! ;-)

It's quiet out there in blogland

Everybody seems to be slowing down on the posting these days... myself included. Here's just a quick update.

I've been sick-ish - just a cold, but my how that can knock a person out. I've been sucking back the DayQuil to get me through. DayQuil, how I love thy orange syruppy goodness. I have NO voice at. all. so teaching was pretty amusing today. Most classes I just took outside, the rest I pulled pity trips on and they were pretty good. In a whisper/wheeze: "Now, I can only talk as loud as this, so I'm reeeeeally gonna need your cooperation today.... Remember, I'm sick, and can't talk over you.... *throws a coughing fit, in part for show*" Ah, if only that worked all the time.

I had a fun weekend - despite said cold. Saturday I went for a hike to Norvan Falls in North Vancouver. It was hike numero uno for the season, yippee! Ok, ok, so it was mostly flat, but it was long-ish (14km return) so I feel justified in calling it a hike. Barely, but I do! :-)

I did announcements in both services on Sunday. I'm not sure if I'm gonna do them again once this schedule is done. After countless requests to use "guests" and not "visitors" (ok! I KNOW already, and have always done that!), THREE reminders to not forget the guest card announcement after I had already assured Pastor S that yes, I had done it last time, and Pastor S constantly nodding in the front row after each announcement, it's makin' me kinda paranoid! I love Pastor S, don't get me wrong, but he's freakin' me out! LOL!

I also got to help smash a hole in the wall of my church with a hammer on Sunday (heh heh, it helped get out some announcement frustration!). The original part of the building has been condemned for nearly 5 years now, and FINALLY we've done the initial rebuild fundraiser campaign, gotten all the permits, and are ready to demolish it. We had a little ceremony between services to say goodbye and to start off the demolition/construction project. Anyone who wanted to could take a swing at the wall. It seemed kinda wrong at first, seeing as this was the building where both sets of my grandparents and my parents went to church, and where I went to Sunday school. But I got over that pretty quick and took a few good swings. Hee hee! (photo courtesy of Brian)

I went (indoor) rock climbing for a friend's birthday Sunday evening. So fun! I haven't done that since grade nine, and I'm wondering why the heck not? Mental note: go rock climbing more often. But maybe not for so long next time. Trying to drive afterwards proved difficult as I had ZERO strength in my hands to grip the steering wheel. It's only my relative distaste for ramming into things with my new car that allowed me to muster up the strength to turn the wheel. (Don't I look like a pro in that photo? Ok, ok... so it's not me ;) That was one of our belayers)

Hmmm... what else?

OH! I went to a TUPPERWARE party last week. I know, I know, not that exciting, but it felt totally house-wifey (which is not a bad thing). There were babies everywhere! I totally didn't fit in, but it was fun anyway! I swore high and low I wasn't gonna buy anything... I ended up ordering almost a hundred bucks worth of stuff. And that "forget-me-not" onion holder thingy. I pretty much HAD to have one of those. It keeps onion stink out of the rest of your veggies and hangs on the shelf of the fridge so you don't...er... forget about it. Hence the name. Aren't they clever. Darn Tupperware and their new designer colours and atendee specials!

Well, this is probably the most boring post ever, but meh, what are ya gonna do. I'm off for a run in the beautiful sunshine. Later!

That's one talented baby!

My friends Brent and Adina have a very cute little baby girl. Hannah is just over 5 months old, and boy does she have spunk! She's recently started her own blog. If you've ever wondered what goes through the mind of a baby, go check our her site. Go on, scat! Say a friendly hello from me!

On marriage, divorce, and the like

Marriage is something I am looking forward to one day, if/when (hopefully 'when!') the right person comes along. But lately, I've had some sobering reminders that it's not easy, and nothing makes us invincible when it comes to keeping that relationship together.

I guess I've been thinking about it because recently I have heard of a slew of couples who have either gotten divorced or separated, or whose marriages have very nearly broken up. Some are friends of my parents who have divorced after 25+ years of marriage or who have nearly split up but are together again after counseling. But some are people my own age: friends, acquaintances, friends of friends. Two couples I've learned about in the last two weeks. I think that's what's really making me look at this.

None of these couples are really close friends (though they're friends nonetheless), so I don't know any details of what happened, really - nor is it any of my business. But the two I've learned of in the past two weeks have really tugged at my heart. There is such pain in the words "My spouse left me." I can't even imagine going through something like that, or especially of hearing a spouse say, "I don't love you anymore. Maybe I never did." One of these freinds wrote his reflections here. I ache at the pain in his words.

How do we really know what love is? And isn't it an action, anyway? How can things go so wrong and get to a point where the damage is irreparable? How do you guard against it? I know there are no guarantees, but as someone who wants very much to be married someday, how do people make marriages last? I do have faith in marriage, and I know that it can and does work, and can be the best (not easiest, but best) experience a person can have. I also know that sometimes it doesn't turn out that way.

Man, thinking about my friends and what I can only imagine they are going through makes me feel so immature. I flit around, go to work, hang out with friends, have crushes, whatever. Sometimes I feel like I'm just a silly little teeny bopper. I have nobody else I have to take into consideration, I do whatever I feel like pretty much, and haven't really had to face any major trials in my life. Don't get me wrong, I'm so grateful for that, but sometimes I just feel like a little kid in a grown-up world.

I guess the other thing I'm thinking about is the whole "religious" aspect of divorce. I've heard people say, "Well, the Bible says divorce is wrong," but what kind of a slap in the face is that to those who are going through that kind of pain? Obviously in a perfect world marriages would last "till death do us part," but we are not perfect people. Sometimes a relationship gets so damaged that it can not be put back together the way it was. Can God bring reconciliation? Of course. Will he always bring it? I don't know. And the more I think about it, the more I feel that it's not my job to know. I think that it's more my job as a friend and as a Christian to love my friends, to pray for them, and to be there when they need an ear or a shoulder or a hug.

I think of my friends - and anyone, for that matter - who are going through or have gone through the breakup of their marriages. All I can do is pray for them and their spouses - that there would be reconciliation between them, whether inside or outside of their marriages. I pray that they know peace and have solid, supportive friends to surround them, and that they experience the closeness of Jesus in a way they've never experienced it before. I really believe that their pain is His pain, and that He weeps along with them. I also pray that He will be their strength and their joy, and that they'd know they are held close in His love.

Keepin' up with them Irish

My calves just aren't up to the challenge.

I went to a Ceili (pronounced "kay-lee") on Saturday night. My friend Trudy harassed invited me to go, and it was a blast. The Vancouver Irish Ceili Society puts on a dance once a month with live Irish music and lessons and everything in this little community hall in East Vancouver.

Ceilis are kind of like square dances, but way more fun and are free of the traumatic junior high memories most of us harbour deep within our souls. (I always ended up having to dance with the teacher - how messed up is that?) Sometimes they're done in a great big cirle, somtimes in a line, and even in a triangle. Come to think of it, never once were we in a square. Ok, so they're not really like square dances. But you have a caller and a partner and a "corner." That's about it.

One-two-three-four-five-six-seven, one-two-three, one-two-three! I still can't get that step out of my head!

I went with about four friends, but ended up bumping into a ton of people I knew from elsewhere there, too. Who'da thunk it? The very first person I saw there, other than the lady at the registration table, was one of my students! She's about the cutest thing you ever saw. She's in grade one, has got a GREAT big smile, red hair, is always dressed super colourfully, and LOVES to sing and dance. Last year she sang "I will survive" in front of the whole school for the talent show (680 kids, plus teachers, parents, etc). I heard this bright little voice saying hi to me and I looked down to see Robin's little face grinning at me. She was waving, too, and was kind of excitedly hopping back and forth! Ah! It was SO cute! I offered to be her partner for one of the dances, it was great! All evening she kept pointing me out to her mom and waving at me. Tee hee!

As I looked around the hall, I saw another one of my students there, too! Holy smokes! This was a grade 6 boy, and he saw me too, but I think he was pretty horrified to see me there! As I danced by him I considered teasing him about him being my volunteer to teach these dances to his class on Friday, but I thought I'd spare him the mortification. Muah ha ha!

After the first dance, I also bumped into a friend of mine from high school. What the heck! Apparently these ceilis are the place to be!

I have to say, I thought I wasn't going to like it, but I'm really glad Trudy dragged invited me out!

My calves, on the other hand, are shaking their... um... fists... at her! I guess that's what happens when you spend a whole evening dancing on your tip-toes! Yeowch!

Amazing Love

Nail pierced hands, A wounded side. This is love. This is love.

~~~~~

I’m forgiven because You were forsaken
I’m accepted, You were condemned
I’m alive and well, Your Spirit is within me
Because You died and rose again

Amazing love, how can it be
That You, my King, should die for me?
Amazing love, I know it’s true
It’s my joy to honour You
In all I do, let me honour You

You are my King
You are my King
Jesus You are my King
You are my King

I’m forgiven because You were forsaken
I’m accepted, You were condemned
I’m alive and well, Your Spirit is within me
Because You died and rose again



Lyrics by T. Butler & M. Young; B.J. Foote

It's official...

I handed in the paper to my pricipal today.

She knows I've been trying to decide for a long time, so when I walked into her office with form in hand, I told her, "I have a piece of paper here that if I give to you right now, now, will be the final step in this process. Eeeeeee!"

Yes, I actually said, "eeeeeeee!" in a high squeaky voice with one eye closed and my face all screwed up to my principal. HA!

I handed her the form and recieved a great big smile and a big, "Welcome to intermediate!" (And then about a thousand requests: "You like coaching, right? And I'd really like for you to be on the committee for the later literacy project. And.. and ... and... " AHHH! One step at a time, here people!)

The timing is right, I'm SOOO thankful that God keeps blessing me with the perfect opportunitites at the perfect time, and I'm excited!!!

*does a little happy dance*

That's it. I'm DONE.

Today was terrible. I woke up and I felt like I had a giant fireball in my throat. I should have just called a sub like any sane person would do, but I wasn't ready for the day, and blah blah blah... So I somehow decided that going for a whole day of teaching MUSIC - you know, singing all day - would be a good plan with a throat that makes me wince when I swallow. Someone should have smacked me. I should know from experience that if I think I shouldn't go in and then do anyway, bad things happen. The last time I did that was when I had my car accident that totalled my car.

Well, today wasn't quite THAT bad, but it WAS one of those days when I was SO frustrated with the kids that I was jsut at a loss as to what to do. At one point I even walked over to one of the shelves, slammed my elbows down on it, and let my head fall into my hands. Not terribly professional, but YIKES. That was the calmest thing I could have done at that point.

The only thing that got me through the day was the chocolate fountain at lunch time. Chocolate. Fountain, people. Cascading chocolate you dip fruit and cake into. It's like a fondue but about a million times better. Oh fountain of sweet creamy goodness, where have you BEEN all my life? It was our once-every-two-months staff luncheon today and one of the teachers brought that peice of beautiful splendor for dessert. Mmmmm...

Uh, where was I? Sorry, I got a little sidetracked. :P

Oh yes... bratty kids... So yeah, the afternoon was worse than the morning, and in a perhaps knee-jerk reaction, I made my decision (you may recall all my agonizing over it here and here).

I am moving to the classroom next year. I want the grade five class.

I have been leaning that way for a while, and someone pointed out to me yesterday that there are two jobs available becuase one teacher is transferring to another school, and one is retiring. That being the case, obviously the teacher who is transferring is taking all his materials and everything with him, BUT the teacher who is retiring won't have need for all that stuff anymore, and may be willing to leave some (a lot?) of it for me. I also realized today that I have spent way too many days being frustrated this year - more days by far than I have spend enjoying my job. I don't want to feel like that anymore.

I think the combination of the grade I want, an available job, the possibility of being set up with a bunch of resources, and the crappy day today all factored into my decision. And I feel pretty good about it, actually. I've already been attending workshops with the possibility in mind of being in the classroom, and I'm starting to think through how I want to structure my class and what my expectations and goals are. I'm feeling more and more ok with it.

I told the retiring teacher today, so he's going to start keeping me in mind as he's going through his stuff. I haven't told my principal yet, but I think I'm going to suck it up and do it tomorrow. (So I can have a four day weekend now to start freaking out!) But I'm already starting to look forward to my own class next year. This is the right thing to do.

Now watch, all those kids that were annoying the heck out of me today? I bet they'll all be in my class next year.

Catching up...

Wow, I really haven't been blogging much lately. Life has been whipping by ay lightning speed. I've often thought about an idea for a post, but I've either been far from my computer at the time or too bleary-eyed tired to actually do anything coherent. So here's the run-down of the last little while:

- This is the first night in 10 nights that I have had free. It's all been great stuff, but I'm sooooo tired! (Well, I guess technically I had last Wednesday night free, but only cause I had a mini break down and bailed on my small group - the night I was supposed to lead, no less! Thank you to my wonderful understanding friends who took over for me at the very last minute.

- 'Member how I got all crazy about taking an improv class? Well, I did, it was great, and now I'm on to another obsession: AFRICAN DRUMMING! As a music teacher, I have taken a few workshops as a music teacher on the djembe and I've really enjoyed it. On a whim last summer at a county fair in Washinton, I bought my very own djembe. I rearely play it, cause well, I don't really know how to, and it's really loud. I SOOO want to go down to Spanish Banks (a beach here in Vancouver) and play in the drumming circle they have there every Sunday night in the summers. I just don't think I can handle all the pot smoke. Blah. BUT, my friend Dave and I went to an African evening at a local high school - complete with a Kenyan meal - YUM!!! - African dance and story telling, and drumming. Oh, the drumming. That was it. I'm on the hunt for a class.

- Most people who know me know that I LOVE taking pictures. I take kajillions of them (and about three of them are even good!). I just have an automatic digital camera, and I've wanted to take a photography course to learn more about compostion and how to use an SLR camera. But recently I've been totally inspired by a friend's FAN-TASTIC online photo gallery. This guy has talent. I want to learn to take shots like that! So. Drumming and photography courses are in my near future. Not sure where I'm going to find the time, but I'm sure gonna try.

- I had a super busy weekend playing tour guide to a friend from out of town - beaches, Victoria, and a Vancouver city tour were all part of the package. It was fun getting to show off my little corner of the world. And I learned that sometimes things can be even better than you expected them to be.

- I went to a mind-blowing seminar on Sunday night called "Holy Week: The week that changed the world," given by Darrell Johnson. Darrell is a former missionary and pastor who now teaches preaching at Regent College. I am blown away every time he preaches. His understanding of the Bible and his totally fresh look at who Jesus is just blows my mind. I usually end up weeping after I hear him speak becasue of the new insight I gain into my saviour. Wow. If at all possible, I'm going to post this seminar somewhere so you can hear it. For now, I would highly reccommend going here and listening to his 3 part series called The Main Thing: "The Lamb of God," "The Son of Man," and "The Great I AM" from July 2005. *low wistle* Wow.

I think that's it for now... my tummy is rumbling! :)

Not Your Buddy

A friend of mine recently passed along this article. I read the first paragraph and thought, "WOW. Every single girl (and single guy!) I know needs to read this." Go check it out... I'll wait... really... go read it...

....

OK, so I know only about 0.2% of you actually read the whole thing, so here are the first few paragraphs just to give you a taste:

The other day I was having lunch with a friend and she began to pour out an all-too-familiar story. The guy she'd been hanging out with four nights a week, the one who'd made her a jazz mix CD and asked her to be his date to his office Christmas party, the one who'd gone to late-night movies with her and made her pasta -- that guy -- had crushed her hopes (again) with a single, nonchalant statement: "I don't see myself in a relationship anytime soon." ...

I felt anger well up. This was not the first time I'd heard this story. I could count nearly half a dozen friends who found themselves in this same frustrating situation. After investing months in late night talks, meals together and flirty e-mails, each woman faced the sad reality that the guy actually wasn't planning to upgrade their friendship...

The author goes on to talk about how she asked a guy friend if he thought it was wrong to initiate one on one friendships with a girl, and particularly why he'd continue to act in a way that signaled a relationship when he had no intentions of carrying through on that. The guy's response was basically, "Well, she's going to read into things whatever I do, so if she doesn't say anything, it's ok."

Personally, I have been in a similar situation before (not recently), and have seen very similar things happening with various girlfriends. The girl is interested in the guy, they hang out one on one, have deep conversations, do things that are clearly "date-ish" and the girl is treated differently than other female friends. Then when the girl can't stand it anymore and finally says something, she gets a comment like, "Oh, yeah, don't't feel that way about you, I just see you as a friend."

I can understand how that can feel good - a guy gets an ego boost, gets to hang out with soneone who they (usually) know is into them, and gets all, or most of, the benefits or a relationship without the commitment of a relationship.

Now before you start yelling at me, I am not saying ALL guys are like this. They're absolutely not. And I think the kind of situation described above is tempting for both guys and for girls. BUT... guy or girl, I don't think it's right to act in a way that makes the other person think that you are intending more than you actually are. What is each person's responsibility in that kind of situation? (I'm talking about when one person has a pretty good idea that the other is into him/her. If they're clueless, well, that's a slightly different situation.) For example, if a guy sings to a girl while staring into her eyes, feeds her dessert, rubs her feet, takes her to the symphony, spends hours talking late into the night, etc etc etc, AND he doesn't do that with other girls, what is the girl SUPPOSED to think?

And of course, that leads to the age-old question of can guys and girls be "just friends?" The article proposes three levels of opposite-sex friendship: acquaintances, companions, and intimate friends. The author suggests that if a guy and a girl get to an "intimate friends" level (and I'm not talking physical stuff - I mean more like one on one time together, emotional connection, that kind of thing) it's usually impossible for one or the other not to develop romantic feelings for one another. Do you think that's true? Can guys and girls be just friends? To what extent?

Have you ever been in this kind of situation before where you've felt that you were getting special treatment and then realized that the other person isn't interested "in that way?" What happened? Or do you disagree that this happens or is a problem?

What are your thoughts???

Some good ol' fashioned silliness

I had an April Fool's/Poisson D'Avril party on Saturday night. My stomach hurt I was laughing so much. I have such great, up-for-whatever-I-throw-at-them friends who came over and helped me be a total wing nut for an evening (I'm only a partial wing nut other times).

The instructions? Come dressed inside out/backwards/wacky/all of the above, and be prepared for a zany evening. We played a number of games, one of which was a balloon stomp that ended with my coat tree tipping over, sending my two stacking shoe shelves (and all the shoes on it) flying. We had a backwards spelling bee, and a game where you had to tie your body into knots around a broomstick and then try to untangle yourself. Ouch. We also ended up having a silly string war of sorts in my living room. There may have been a gong, whoopie cushions, and a clapper involved. Weeehaaaw! It was so great to release that inner wacky.

Click here for more pictures.

Annoying

Why is it that the option that seems to make the most sense is also the one that seems farthest from any sort of possibility???

Decision 2006 - update

Last week I wrote about a big decision that's coming up - whether to continue teaching music or to move to the classroom. (The post was loooong. Thank you SO much to everyone who waded through it, and especially to all those who left such encouraging, kind comments! It was much appreciated.).

"Wait a second... 'coming up'?" you ask... Yep. My principal asked me on Wednesday what I was thinking of for next year, and I told her I was still trying to decide, etc, but that not to worry, I would tell her by Friday. She then told me that the form that was supposed to be in by Friday is only really for those wanting to increase or decrease their time, and that I only really had to tell her what I wanted for next year before she sends out the job postings, which is in like MAY. Aaauurrgggghhh!

By the end of last week, I was leaning towards the classroom. Intances like those I had last week with Johnny made me realize that I want to be a safe haven for kids like that - to get to know them - and of course other kids, too - better and to be able to have a deeper impact on them that what I can do as a music teacher. I've also been doing a lot of thinking about passion, and what mine is and how that works into my job (don't worry, GP, it's coming, I promise, though I'll probably be able to tell you before I type it out!). I had a moment of clarity on Thursday, too, when I asked myself, "Could you see yourself doing a whole 'nother year of this?" It was sssllllooow getting started this year, and I felt right out of ideas and inspiration. I couldn't see myeslf doing it again for another year.

But then I went to a music teacher's workshop on Saturday. These workshops are always so fabulous, and I get so many great ideas and get inspired by all the clinicians and even the other teachers there. I know that what I really need to do is to take the Orff courses (a method of teaching music to children) so that I feel more equipped to do this job. But they're in the summer and are expensive. I have to work in July to pay the bills, and that's when the course is offered. I met another music teacher, too, who is going through exactly the same debate. She added another point to my thought process - I've spent three years building up not only the music program, but also a portfolio of sorts AND a whole network of professional contacts. If I go to the classroom, am I throwing that all away?

And so the proverbial pendulum was heading on it's way to one side, but is now back stuck in the middle, and I no longer have an imminent deadline. Time to keep praying.....