Thursday, May 26, 2005

One on One

Look out, my issues are showing. :D

I have a hard time hanging out with guy friends, particularly ones that I don't know that well, one on one. I get all panicky and wonder what if there might be something behind it. Is he interested? Am I? Just what IS this, anyway?

In the past, I would have said without a doubt that guys and girls can just be friends with nothing else behind it. Though I still want to believe that, I have to say I'm beginning to wonder. Sure, there are the "safe" guys - either they're married (though a single girl hanging out one on one with a married guy, no matter how innocent, should be handled with great caution), or you've already dated them, found out it won't work, and are still friends, or there's just no possibly you'd be interested in THAT way, but they're still great people. With those guy's it's easier. But those guys are few and far between.

If I end up hanging out with any other guy, I start analyzing. And analyzing. And analyzing. It's a curse, a curse, I tell you! Might he be interested? Or is he just being a nice guy? (I should stop and point out here that I am a firm believer that there ARE nice guys out there - guys who will treat a girl with right because they are decent human beings, not for any ulterior motive.) Am *I* interested? Is there potential there? Or do I tell my brain to shut up and just enjoy the time spent with a friend? That last one is probably the best option, but it's easier said than done! :P

Now often those questions are answered fairly quickly. Either they mention an interest in someone else, or I get to know them better and realize that they're just really sweet to everyone, or whatever. But still, why do I put myself through all this wondering beforehand? It's enough to drive a girl crazy!


johnny walker said...

I think you're thinking too much in these cases. My approach, when spending time with someone of the opposite sex, is "Who cares if she is interested, and I'm not?" It's all about setting boundaries, if you need to. As long as the person with whom you are spending time with is not some sort of violent sociopath, you should be just fine. :)

steve said...

i wonder about those things too a lot..but eventually i figure out either it's going to have to work out (like actually hooking up) or in most cases - "let's be friends". and the phrase "let's be friends" can mean so many things everything and in between.